I can typically see a silver lining in any situation, but this past week has been particularly difficult for me. My heart is hurting, I’m overwhelmed, and I’m ready for this to be over.

I miss my Mimi. She has dementia and none of her family is around.

I miss my mom.

I miss my in-laws.

I miss my church.

I miss my friends.

As a school principal, I desperately miss my teachers, my students, and their families. 

Working from home and homeschooling a child is hard. Moms and dads, I feel you.

This week reminded me of my grandpa’s passing. He was the only father figure in my life, and I was devastated. I had never experienced such overwhelming pain and sadness, but I assumed there was a time limit for grief and then I needed to get back to normal life. After some time had passed, I became frustrated that I wasn’t feeling better. It was my best friend who called me out, as all good friends do: “You can let yourself feel sad, you know.”

This shocking realization awakened me. I had become so used to painting a silver lining in every cloud that I hadn’t allowed myself to grieve and process the pain, but I needed that time in order to grow. 

So often we are pressured into rushing ourselves through our feelings or pushing them aside in order to keep things going. What we don’t realize is that embracing those feelings and allowing them to just be is a part of moving forward. If we don’t allow ourselves time to process emotions like anger, grief, sadness, or heartbreak, we can never truly heal.

This concept isn’t isolated to the current pandemic and economic shutdown; it applies to any crisis you have gone through, are going through, or will go through.  We are human, and we all experience crises in different ways. However you’re feeling is normal for you, and it’s okay.

It’s okay not to be okay.

A critical part of healing and growing also lies in finding opportunities in the chaos and moving toward them. God always provides a way to make light from darkness—you just have to seek it. Right now though, take the time you need to process whatever you are feeling. Embrace the opportunity to meet yourself and love yourself right where you are, and know you are not alone.

You will get through this.

Margaret McCormick is a core energy coach in the Austin area. She partners with survivors of unexpected life events to help them regain control over their minds, bodies, and spirits.