I had a realization one morning while practicing yoga. I was calmly and peacefully breathing into a strong plank pose when I looked down at my arms and thought, Holy cow! My arms look GREAT! While I was excited about this transformation, I realized, with a tinge of regret, that I had been focusing so much on the destination that I’d missed out on the journey to this accomplishment.

I’ve always been impatient when it comes to my personal journeys—whether it be my weight loss journey, my career journey, my relationship journey, or this new journey of building my coaching business. I have always wanted to just “be there already.” I am that child in the backseat of my life’s road trip yelling, “Are we there yet?!” That morning as I was resting (yes, resting) in plank pose, I pondered on how much I would like to enjoy the process of becoming stronger in all aspects of my life. I want to treasure every beautiful moment in the forming of my relationships. I want to appreciate every trial and error, as well as celebrate every small success, in the creation and development of my coaching practice. I want to watch myself get stronger.

This awareness catapulted me into a new myriad of thoughts—Is this why we’re so unhappy and dissatisfied with where we are in life? Is it that we’re so busy looking at where we’re not that we forget to slow down and be fully present where we are? 

I am reminded of a heavy disagreement I had with my fiancé a few months ago when he was still my boyfriend. It was uncomfortable and difficult, but as the dust settled, I took time to reflect on the whole situation: the arguing, the resolution—all of it. I had so badly wanted us to be engaged and moving ahead with the next phase of our relationship that I hadn’t recognized I was missing out on the growth of our relationship, a process that was actually building us as a couple, and I needed to slow down and enjoy the beautiful process of becoming engaged.

Relishing the joy in all of the small moments has helped reduce my stress even while Chris and I are faced with obstacles to our wedding planning due to a global pandemic, and I am mindfully soaking up every precious detail leading to our becoming married.

Embracing where you are does not devalue the power of visioning and goal-setting. 

Knowing where we want to go gives us power and intent. We can achieve great success by setting clear goals and working toward them, but if we are only focused on the end goal without acknowledging our present, we may lose the beauty that can be found in just being.

It’s easy to become frustrated with where you are when where you want to be seems so far off, but trust the process—it’s growing you. 

Like the majestic oak tree in my front yard, we are never finished growing. You will always find more places to go and discover more ways in which you want to develop yourself, but don’t forget to cherish the present. 

Enjoy becoming.

Margaret McCormick is a core energy coach in the Austin area. She partners with survivors of unexpected life events to help them regain control over their minds, bodies, and spirits.